Balance
There are certain ideas bantered about so frequently and repeatedly with such sincerity that no one questions their accuracy. One such idea is the issue of work/home balance.
Conflict?
The idea is that there is a conflict between one’s work and one’s home life. Particularly for entrepreneurs and business people, the issue is poignant and fraught with negative consequences. For an entrepreneur, not a week goes by when he/she doesn’t feel guilty for choosing one side or the other. You can easily spend more time in the business, and just as easily spend more time with the family. Going home often means leaving something undone at the business. So, you are guilty and anxious about that. Attending to the task at the business often means leaving something undone at home, or someone unattended to, and you feel guilty about that. For most entrepreneurs, then, most weeks are a lose/lose proposition. No matter what you do, it causes negative consequences.
Books have been written on the subject, and consultants have developed careers built around giving advice to those in the throes of the issue. Clearly, the issue has a lot of currency in our culture.
What Does the Bible Say?
It is in these kinds of issues that some Biblical guidance is helpful. What does the Bible say about work/home balance?
Nothing.
It is a non-issue in the Bible. I know this will upset lots of people. When you look at the two sides in the equation, family and business, you discover almost nothing about family. There are quite a few examples and instructions about business.
For example, we almost never see young children in the Bible. I am aware of only two appearances of a young child.The first occurs in the story of the adolescent Jesus. He was lost for three days on his parent’s trip home from Jerusalem. He was more likely an adolescent in this story than a young child. There is the incident of Jesus explaining to the disciples that one needed to be like a young child in order to enter into the kingdom of God. There were young children present at that event.
There are no examples of family meals together, or parents spending ‘quality time’ with young children. In the Bible, there wasn’t a dichotomy between work and family: Folks didn’t bring their work home to the family, they brought the family into the business.
When we see children, they are almost always teenagers or young adults, and almost always within the context of the family business.
Family Business
- Joseph, along with his brothers, was tending to a portion of his father’s massive livestock holdings when he was sold as a slave.
- Saul was attending to a project for his father’s business when he was called to be Israel’s first king.
- David was tending to his father’s assets (sheep) when he was called to be King of Israel.
While there is little guidance in the form of specific directions on this issue, we do see a pattern modeled in the Bible. The pattern is that the family joins the head of the household in the family business.
Now, before we go off on all the reasons why the Biblical model won’t work today, let’s just play a bit with the idea.
What could it look like, if we were to try to bring our families into the business, rather than separate the two?
Don’t Separate Family and Business
A starting point would be the ‘Bring your child to work’ day. But that is a relatively innocuous event relative to what you could do.
For example, evening meals could be a time to discuss the day’s events at work — the problems, challenges, and successes – just as much or more than the kid’s school day.
There may some business tasks that might be delegated to the family. For example, at one point in my life, I was a salesperson for a hospital supply distributor. My company provided weekly sales reports, showing every item ordered, shipped and invoiced to every customer. That was nice, but I wanted to see patterns over time. In other words, I wanted to know what they bought this week, last week, the week before that, etc. So, I had my kids cut up the computer reports, sort them by the customer, staple them to scrap paper, and file alphabetically in my account folders. They earned their allowance, got an insight into Dad’s job, and provided a valuable service.
Opportunities
Business picnics and outings could bring people together and provide a topic of conversation in the family.
Business can undertake service projects – painting a widow’s home, tiding up a roadway, etc., and turn them into family events.
The possibilities for involving families in the business are virtually unlimited. It just takes a change in mindset and some creative thinking. You could ask yourself this question, “What changes can I make in the business that will allow us to more regularly bring families into the business?” If you have an executive team, brainstorm the same question.
Just the fact that you are asking that question alone separates you from the clear majority of businesses in the world. It’s the first step in providing a Biblical solution to the work/family conflict.
We are living in an age when many parents revolve their lives around their children. As a result, the children naturally gain the idea that the world revolves around them, and that they are entitled to whatever they want. Christian business can provide a real-life opportunity for the kids to be involved in something bigger than themselves. Within the business context, they learn work ethic, responsibility, getting along with others, and taking direction from authority figures.
Christian businesses are uniquely positioned to provide a focal point for the family, to help in the development of the stakeholder’s families, and to alleviate the work/home conflict. Biblical businesses build better families.
If you have an example of some ways families are involved in your business or job, please comment and share it. Let’s learn from each other.
I actually disagree with this. I’m a Christian, I’m a business person and I am married to a workaholic. He puts work before family and if I showed him this it would encourage his behavior.
You have to take time for yourself and for family and separate work from home. It’s not healthy. I agree with you on most things but this one, I feel is off.
It would be a dull world, Jo, if everyone agreed with everything I said. That’s what makes the world go round. Thanks for your comments.
Your article reminds me of my growing up years. I had the great privilege of working on the family farm. We learned the value of hard work and family working side by side. We didn’t worry about “balance.” The work had to get done and we did it together, sometimes 18 hours a day during harvest. It was the family business. Our business is different now, but we kept the same principle, we work together and in the process, our kids learn our biblical values as well as our work ethic.
It is apparent by your admission there is a concern that ought to be addressed – “he puts his work before his family”, in contrast to your position, “You have to take time for yourself and for family…” What I have done was have periodic evaluation by my family where my wife and children had input – How am I doing as a husband, a father, a provider and so forth. I did not always get straight A’s. Because at times I had lost the pulse of my family due to personal, work or church concerns at the expense of them. I culled this from 1 Timothy 5:8, But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel. My children are “grown and mostly gone”, but this helped them develop communication skills as it was required they speak their heart and mind respectfully. It also taught me lessons of humility to receive and respond to their input. It also taught them valuable lessons about relational dynamics, problem-solving and so on. This approach was birthed as I had a strong reaction to my oldest child’s report card and my wife responded, “How would you be doing if we were to be grading you?” The short fuses were doused as I asked forgiveness from my daughter and then I did ask -“How am I really doing…”
Thanks for sharing, Reed. A great example for all of us.